Thank you Katie, and everyone for tonight's meeting and meditation.
I am aware ... of breathing,
I am aware ... of hearing,
I am aware ... of sensation,
I am aware ... of feeling,
I am aware ... of thinking (only one thought at a time),
I am aware ... of disharmony.
I am aware ... of harmony!
I am aware ... that I am, that I exist, before thought tries to explain reality to me.
What is the unchanging, common ground of everything, as far as it practically relates to "my" life?
"I am aware" ... is at the core of my Being.
Without "I am aware" nothing matters, as far as I am concerned.
As "person" we lost touch of the most obvious, natural and effortless:
"I am, I exist"!
"Know the truth and the truth will set you free" is not a future hope, not an escape or a painkiller for our sense of being a separate-self.
"Know the truth" is a super practical instruction to effortlessly examine the nature of our own mind, and not to be intimidated by its fears and limited conclusions.
"Truth" is that which never changes.
The truth is not in the realm of the changeful, the realm of effects, objects, thoughts and feelings.
"Know the truth" is not a gaining, it is not a struggle, but the effortless peace of the experience that "I am, I exist" ... before our conditioned thinking tries to control and freeze reality into fixed thoughts.
"I am aware" ... is easily overlooked -- for most people for their whole life --, because our person mind cannot process stillness! The person mind is actually afraid of stillness; that's why our thinking can be so incessant.
The sense of "me" exists only in our thinking and memory, and when thinking comes to an end the "me" fears for its delusory existence.
What is spiritual awakening?
It is not a super power, it is not the end of the flow of life, but it is a simple, humbling insight into the nature of our mind, and how we create our own suffering through a false sense of self.
Our natural sense of Self is "I am, I exist"; but due to our process of personal development we get involuntarily lost in the sense of "me" as a separate-self that needs to struggle, compete and survive. We learn "me" as a separate-self, seemingly cut-off from Source.
Our thinking is not the problem, but our sense of Self!
Practicing I am?
We cannot really become what we effortlessly are, but as a loving concession we can say that in the beginning "I am" can be practiced.
But we have to be gentle and vigilant, because our person mind is strangely afraid of liberation; it prefers the familiar over peace.
If our "practice" is driven by ego to achieve something, then we might overlook the harmony and fulfillment of our here and now, as what IS.
Yes... let's practice "I am"
... effortlessly, lovingly!
Instead to meditate once a week for an hour, it is much more effective to pause every hour, just for 10-30 seconds and to turn within... and ask our self: am I aware?
Not as a chore with an aim, but just because there is really nothing more important in life!
"I am aware ..." is at the core of everything in this ephemeral world.
If our sense of self is distorted then our understanding and attitude is off.
... just look at the world!
This is not a thinkers question, but a simple self-confirming living experience: "I am aware, I exist".
There is nothing pretentious about it.
It is very subtle.
It is our core.
But believe it or not, it is powerful in gently eroding our erroneous sense of self.
Sorry for so many words, and I am not expecting that anyone reads so far; we are rather programmed for entertainment and excitement, and thereby overlook the most obvious: I am, I exist.
There is more to it, but until there is a hunger inside of us for our suffering to stop, we cannot help to ignore our peace here and now and seek for it elsewhere in temporary effects.
Holger @ BeingTogether.Live